How every moment of my day is action.

That my calendar has no respite
and friendships feel a duty.

That I stride down the street,
irritated by others’ pace and inefficiency.

That my stomach is tight
and I’m holding my breath.

That I’m eating with urgency
while working or watching.

That conversations stream forth without pause,
without silence.
And I can talk about feelings
without really feeling.

When I’m cold or thirsty and still don’t stop typing.
Or sitting uncomfortably, scrolling and swiping.

That my body is buzzing
with perpetual alertness.
Poised for action in every moment.

And while part of me gets a kick
out of how darn productive I am,
Another part is crying
with exhaustion.

And I know I need rest.
I know I need rest.
I know I need rest.

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